Before I went to church this Sunday, a couple of experiences prepared my heart to begin this process of improvement. After a frustrating experience at the DMV that could have cost us thousands of dollars (because of UVU's state residency requirements. Neal will be attending UVU in the fall), I was completely devastated and despondent. Neal tried to convince me that maybe I couldn't always have things my way. I had tried my best, and the rest was in God's hands. It wasn't exactly what I wanted to hear at the moment (this is why I need to be improving, I guess), but that experience kept my mind open for similar advice that I got from a friend in my editing class.
I saw Aaron with his head down on his desk. He was catching a few winks of sleep during the class break. I asked him how his newborn baby was, and we chatted about spring term. Aaron told me that he was going through the double pressures of spring term only so he could graduate faster. He had a new baby girl and a wife that needed to be supported, so he was taking all the classes he could manage so that he could more quickly obtain a salaried job. In the meantime, he told me, he was working two part-time jobs just to put the food on the table.
"School., two jobs, and a newborn baby?" I said. "I don't know how you do it."
He replied simply, "It's called relying on Jesus."
Bear in mind that Aaron also finishes all his homework well ahead of class, something I regularly fail to do. This advice combined with the thorough heart softening I had received with my own husband served as the perfect preparation for church on Sunday.
During Sunday School, the first counselor announced that we would be having a surprise combined Relief Society / Elders Quorum meeting. The guest speakers were Brother and Sister Smith, who had recently returned from serving in the Marshall Islands Mission. Brother Smith gave a brilliant metaphor for how we must approach life. He told us about when he and our bishop went out snowmobiling together, and how the only way to make it up the snow-covered mountain was to always keep your thumb pressed down on the throttle. If you were to get scared, release your grip, the snowmobile would topple over backwards because of the steep slope, and you would get seriously hurt. The idea struck me that this was what I needed to do.
I've always had a problem with keeping up my momentum. If I get on the computer in the middle of my homework assignments, I just lose all motivation to do them and wind up procrastinating until the last possible moment. But today I've decided differently. Here are the things that I'm going to be most working on:
1. Gospel study: 100 percent for 100 days. Apparently this program has been emphasized in my ward and I knew nothing about it. It's really simple: do everything you're supposed to do consistently until it becomes a lifelong habit. This means personal and family scripture study and prayer, at least monthly visits to the temple, consistent family home evenings and date nights, and daily reminders of love and affection for your spouse. Neal has agreed heartily to this task, and I'm excited to see our relationship improve as we draw closer to the Savior and to ourselves.
2. Cleaning the house. Also when I was in Relief Society, I grabbed a chore list for daily, weekly, monthly, and seasonal tasks that would keep our house in better order. Being tidy has also been a long struggle for me, and I've adapted these chores to fit our household. As much as neither Neal nor I am used to this consistent cleaning, I've gotten him to agree, at least to see how it works out. I'm really hoping that we can maintain the drive here because I don't want to live in filth.
3. Doing my homework well and on time. This, for me, is where "keeping my thumb on the throttle" really comes into play. As I said before, I have a huge procrastination problem, so it really comes down to treating my homework like the job that it is and doing it with my best effort and as much attention as I can muster. I hope that keeping on top of my schoolwork will leave more time for me to spend with Neal.
In conclusion, wish me luck. I have a lot of work to do.
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